Did you know there’s a positive side to anger?

Most of us try to avoid it as much as possible because it feels bad to be angry or to have others angry with us. But actually, there’s an important purpose to anger.

Anger is a spontaneous emotion that acts like a personal security alarm. When it sounds, it alerts us that there may be danger about. Like our home security systems, most alarms are false, but you don’t know until you investigate further.

The same is true with anger. Most of the time there is a misunderstanding or misjudgment that’s created a false alarm. Yet, if it’s a real intruder, you want to know so you can protect yourself. When you feel angry, it means there’s a potential violation and you must explore to discover if there’s real danger or if it’s a false alarm. On the other hand, if we believe every alarm is real, our natural sense of trust will be compromised. When this happens, we invite unnecessary anxiety.

If you notice you’re feeling angry, do these 3 things:

1. Fully allow yourself to feel it and give your body permission to express it safely (writing or movement).

“Safely” means NOT to the person with whom you’re angry as damage can happen.  The release is for your body… so use the wonderful tools of writing or movement.

2. Discern if there’s a real emotional or physical danger about, or whether you or others are misunderstanding the situation.  

In other words, you have to investigate.

3.  Take specific steps to keep yourself emotionally safe.

3 actions to consider:

• Communicating with others.
• Clarifying your boundaries (with yourself and possibly speaking them to others).
• Making requests and responding to others requests.

When anger is stuffed, it can become hostility, a cynical view of the world, which is associated with higher heart disease.

Stay healthy and the next time you feel angry; Feel it, Safely Express it, Investigate The Cause, and Act to keep yourself emotionally safe! Warmly, Dr. Deb.

Watch This 4 Minute Video Where Psychotherapist Dr. Deb Sandella Explains The Positive Side To Anger:

For more than 40 years, Award Winning and Best-Selling Author & Psychotherapist Dr. Deb Sandella has helped thousands heal trauma, move through grief and gain access to more laughter, greater financial success, and deeper, more loving relationships. This former university professor developed the RIM® (Regenerating Images in Memory) Method that alleviates suffering and supports you to claim the happier, healthier life you deserve. RIM® is used by therapists, coaches, organizational consultants and school social workers globally and has helped countless individuals transform past trauma for a more fulfilled life. She frequently brings her teachings to Jack Canfield’s events.

To learn about having a personal healing session or becoming a Certified RIM Facilitator visit the RIMinstitute.com