Have you noticed how your perspective can completely transform a situation?
Recently, my husband and I went on a romantic weekend to celebrate our anniversary. As we prepared for dinner, I found myself feeling less excited than I had anticipated. After thirty-one years of anniversaries, I guess there was some feeling of “been there, done that.” Suddenly, we had an intuitive flash and decided to pretend we were on a first date. Our eyes lit up, we poured a glass of wine and the evening ensued… Hmm… would we sleep together on our first date?
Interestingly, a spontaneous conversation developed where we both shared that we were divorced (from our previous 30 years of marriage that is…). What a strange perspective to imagine being divorced from our mutual past, and even more interesting to see each other as if for the first time.
As the evening progressed, we became more attentive to each other than we’ve been in years. Hanging on every comment and asking questions. I even found myself noticing him in a “date” way… contemplating… would I want to see him again?… is he the kind of man with whom I would want to spend my life?…
At some point in the evening, I noticed his beautiful blue eyes and how sweet he was when he spoke tenderly about wanting to support his daughter as she emancipated. And something he asked me about my dad, quite to my surprise, surfaced tears.
It was a beautiful evening… playful, tender and open… the same qualities that attracted us to each other in the first place. The familiarity and inherent power struggle of marriage fell away, and we looked with new eyes… eyes of curiosity, wonder and adventure.
What aspect of your life seeks new eyes? Your relationship with your partner… your child… your boss… your roommate… your friend… your work… maybe yourself…
May this month’s meditation open your “new eyes.”
Looking with New Eyes…
Taking a deep, relaxing breath, your attention easily focuses on your heart. As you breath in through the front of your heart and exhale through your upper back… Taking another deep breath in through your eyeballs and exhaling through your forehead… a name or word or image naturally pops into? awareness. You recognize it right off as that which seeks new eyes in your life this moment… Receiving it with ease… you sense the person or aspect of your life … that’s showing up.
Whatever rises up, welcome it and allow… it’s just a feeling… nothing more or less … transient energy of emotion passing through…informing you like a compass…
Now sense in your body where there’s a yearning… maybe in your hands… feet… throat… arms… could be anywhere…
Wherever it is… explore it in detail with your attention… it’s size, shape, weight etc. and move into it… be it and notice your experience… There in the center of this energy, you’ll easily sense that which you are divorcing… that which has had it’s share of your time and energy and is no longer juicy… it may be an “old shoe” attitude… a rut you’ve been digging for a long time… a feeling of unworthiness… a feeling of betrayal… it could be anything… and whatever it is… it rises into clarity right now in your mind.
As you allow and embrace this which is no longer alive, it easily dissolves and transforms…
Quite magically, you sense your own eyes looking back at you… only now they have a new mystique… a different perspective… a new way of thinking about this old habit… a new sparkle… Allowing it to be known as best as you can… the new sight deepens and expands throughout your body.
And, you sense the fresh perspective playing like a movie… As all your preconceived ideas about this person/issue fade from view, you sense him/her/it as if for the first time. Noticing the feeling in your heart and body, you sense something different than ever before. New words, new questions, new insights, a new connection that pulses with DISCOVERY and PASSION.
Enjoy!
Wishing you a spring full of sunny days and passionate nights,
Much Love,
dr.deb
